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๐Living together is, after all, the
only way one could fathom another human being in the most intimate way and would know every single idiosyncrasy there is to put up with for life, or else, for as long as it is bearable. This is how Angela Senevirathna has written about "Living Together" in "The Morning" newspaper.
Why should we talk about Living Together which is considered taboo in Sri Lanka?
This situation comes not within a family with happy breakfasts and lovely smiles but within a family with a lot of chaos, incompatibilities and misunderstandings. This issue requires necessary attention. As in comparison to 42% in the United Kingdom, the divorce rate is reported to be approximately 1.5% of the population in Sri Lanka (Social Scientist Association,2017). Even though it shows a tendency towards divorce compared to the developed countries, it is comparatively higher and is growing significantly than before.
Although from teenage every individual is dreaming of a happy life partner with a successful life, most of the relationships end up with divorce after the marriage.
Most importantly, both parties have to be concerned about the compatibility in habits. This is obviously the first benefit that should come into mind. Imagine a moment of thinking about moving in together: You'll find out how tolerant you can be, as well as how upset you each get at your various differences. If you’re a total neat freak and your partner isn’t quite so bothered by things piling up here and there or leaving dishes in the sink for a few days, it will help you to figure out how to normalize life events.
Being an Asian conservative country concept of Living Together is considered a controversial topic. That is why most people refrain from living together though they acknowledge that it is the best way to understand each other. However, we are living in the 21st century. Think before you tie the knot.
living together is the best way to identify each other and there's absolutely no doubt in it. but the problem is, as Sri lankans can the youth in this country afford such a free go life style along with the messed up and very hard economy in the country.? Most of the time the youth in the country are being subjective to the competitive educational system and their main goal after A/L is to acquire a degree. very rarely we can see someone managing the financial expenses of him/her on their own. These students are dependent on their parents even until about 25 or 26 years of age. Then after their degrees the parents force the children to marriage (Especially girls) because they want the cleanse their hands off the responsibilities. so they can neither afford living together nor they have the time for it. In my P.O.V. though living together is the best approach to identify each other in love life, Sri Lankans cannot practice it due to the screwed up and long prevailing system. If someone wants to break the wheel He/She needs to be an exceptional case with double extra efforts.
ReplyDeleteYes, there is no doubt that living together is the best option to understand each other before marriage. But this also makes the possibility of not marrying the other high. Well, it is not a bad thing though. After all, you will have to live with your partner for the rest of your lifetime. If you feel like you can not live with them it is okay not to marry. After all who says that we definitely have to marry someone in our life?
ReplyDeleteWhat is important in anyone’s life is happiness and peace of mind. If your dating life or marriage life ruins that what is the meaning of dating after all? Living together helps people understand their similarities and differences. If the couple is willing to adjust them and live it would be great. But not all relationships work like this. Some can not work things no matter how hard they try. All of these you can understand by living together before marriage. Though a taboo in Sri Lanka living together should be normalized because that would actually prevent so many visits to the court.
Ofc the est way to start up a happy life together is living together and understanding each other..... but darling we still live in so called SRI LANKA...๐คท♀️
ReplyDeleteThe concept of living together is very much needed specially in modern society, since most of the married couples go ahead with divorce cases even before they receive their wedding album. This phenomena has become a common issue in Sri Lanka that is because of the lack of understanding between the duo. Thus the understanding of the feelings of each other, dislikes and likes, wants and needs,habits are very much important to have a good family life. Although a boy or a girl starts an affair with someone,specially the parents of girls restrict them to have an affair with a boy. Some parents try to restrict the feelings of the children and they do not allow to have affairs ( specially sexual affairs) before marriage. Sex is considered as a sin by Sri Lankans. So how can someone understand his or her partner's desires and feelings before step onto a marriage. So being a human of Sri Lankan conservative society the question comes how can we at least think about living together although it is much needed.
ReplyDeleteI also do agree with the concept of living together. Instead of marrying someone whose qualities are not suitable to you and living a life of ruination, and later going for the divorce cases wasting your time, I think that living together with someone and understanding him /her well is the best option. But, here in Sri Lanka, because of being a so called cultured and traditional country, acting out this concept is much difficult. So, it is important if the people who are considered as cultured can understand the positive effect of this concept - living together
ReplyDeleteWhen I came across the topic of marriage,I feel marriage is the very way of turning our simple life style in to a complex one for the sake of our own desire. In brief, even the very word marriage is a tangle of problems for me. But there is crucial issues what everybody can consider although you vote for live in together or marriage life. MUTUAL UNDERSTANDING is the burning problem which causes for the destruction of marriage lives or love affairs. The living together concept is introduced in such a surrounding as a 'solution'. But do you think that if you and your partner are having a very busy life;i.e.,may be because of your job..., can afford a time to grow up the mutual understanding between both of you? No. Mutual understanding is something grows gradually with the time. But according to the busy lifestyle do you think that you can spent time in that manner even though you live in together or spend a marriage life? no. Then where is the problem? Most probably in our busy lifestyle!. THAT IS THE PLACE WE SHOULD HEAL FIRST OF ALL. After that there will not be issues with regard to lack of understanding, in your marriage life or disappointment about your choice of living together.
ReplyDeleteYes.Living together is a best option to understand each other before the marriage. It helps to the couple to get a better understanding about each other. Although it is a best way to minimize the number of divorces in society, in Sri Lanka with so called culture it is difficult to have such concept practically. In Western countries living together is a normal thing, but in Asian countries like Sri Lanka it is not normal. People do not accept such things although it leads couples to have better marriage lives. In Sri Lanka, most of people see that a girl who has lots of male friends as a bad one or a shameless girl. So, a concept like living together is not accepted by the majority of people although it is a best option to minimize the number of divorces in society.
ReplyDeleteYes, it is true that living together is the best way to understand each other before you marry, because it is better to identity your partner's ideas, desires, strengths and weaknesses to lead a good marriage life. But in Sri Lanka, living together before marriage is considered a misdeed. The reason is our culture and tradition. Sri Lankan people are highly bound with traditions. Therefore, it is not important whether living together is benificial or not. We used to consider it as a wrongdoing. Today, in this modern world people use very smart strategies to lead a quality life, but this cultural boundness in Sri Lanka obstruct people to lead such a quality life. Living together is a good option to reduce divorce cases that are mostly occured from misunderstanding. If we practice this method, it would help to live happily with minimum arguments and disagreements in marriage life.
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