Lara Jean and Peter Kevinsky; do they feel better as the two closest friends working for their little agreement or building up a romance in between them?
We think that love is the most valuable thing in life but friendship is really the most valuable thing in life. No matter how many selfless stories are there in the word LOVE, we honestly love our illnesses and give them the name of LOVE. Our insecurity. The inability of us to be alone. The pride we have in having someone else's life. The right. Love is something like nirvana. There is no point in trying to win it. It is not possible to say whether it will be found or not. There can only be an idea of that.
But friendship is different. The most important thing in friendship is the freedom of the other. If one becomes a pain in ass, friendship won't last as how it is. There is nothing unspeakable inside a friendship. There is nothing that cannot be exchanged. But the most important thing is the respect of the other. The friendship lives on that dignity. But in the instance friendship changes into love this friend is the one we lose when we fall in love. The friend who allowed our madness, our nonsense, our freedom, the friend we look forward to meeting at any time.
If LOVE is a limit based on rights, then FRIENDSHIP is a love based on freedom.
ReplyDelete"But in the instance friendship changes into love this friend is the one we lose when we fall in love. The friend who allowed our madness, our nonsense, our freedom, the friend we look forward to meeting at any time"
So I cannot completely agree with this statement .
What we know is that trust is the base of every relationship, and If the person who was once your friend changes after he/she become your lover , then what is actually the base of that relationship? What I think Is that there's always a choice , there's a choice whether you want to be loved , whether u want to love a changed person or else whether you dont want to be in love. And if a man or woman limits your happiness when you become lovers , and does not give the freedom he or she gave when he/she was your friend , this means that the person you fell in love with, does not even exist anymore. Because freedom and restriction are completely opposite things , and if the person who allowed you to do anything , eventually changes into a person who restricts your freedom , then it's a total betrayal . Right ? We fall in love not only with the person himself/herself , right ? We fall in love with the person's atitudes, opinions, personality and everything. Then at some point in your life if any of these things changes , this means that the person whom you fell in love with no longer exists , right ? So if a person's opinions change with the nature of a relationship:friendship into love , then that person is not at all reliable , he/she is only a clamoufarging lizard . Change is an inevitable truth of life ,yet some changes paves the way to certain choices which will decide our future.
I agree with your statement because I think friendship is better than love.
ReplyDeleteIt is better to be friends with someone, even if you love them because at the end of the day if you date them, the possibility of losing them is high. You might get rejected after confessing to your friend which would even make the friendship cease. Even if you build up a romantic relationship the possibility of a breakup is high. With love, there come a lot of reasons to argue or fight about, where friends do not make a huge issue of it.
Friends do not restrict you with your life. There is always the freedom of being yourself where most of the time love requires you to change according to the other person. You might lose yourself in the progress or in the worst case you might hate yourself if the other person leaves you. This is an inevitable truth most of the time. So if you have the freedom to chose between being friends or being lovers, it is better to stay as friends, because the possibility of staying forever is really high.
Everyone says that love is endless, love is beautiful and nothin is purer than true love. but such "happily ever after" stories remain only in fairy tales. Like Cinderella was rescued from her misery by a prince in charm, nobody will come and bring us to a worldly heaven. Here I am not being sarcastic about love, but what I want to highlight is that every single relationship has its own ups and downs. It can be over-protection, jealousy or even love and care as they put definition into it, but a single word can change the flow of a relationship.
ReplyDeleteBut, on the other hand, friendship is something else. A friend is someone who allows our madness, our nonsense, our freedom, and he/she is the one we look forward to meeting at any time. There is no barrier for friends. The things we cannot share with our lover, is not unspeakable before the friend. That is the trust we have upon them.
If we take the movie, Lara Jean and Peter were able to share their sad memories, even awkward moments when they were friends, but when they start the relationship, some stories, some situations become unspeakable, may be because of their fear to lose each other, or become an nuisance.
So, my point is, how much someone lay their faith on love, friendship is far better for a human being. It is like a comfort zone, without being perfect for the partner, without caring too much before speaking or doing something or being jealous.
I can not completely agree with you Kasuni because there are lovers who were friends earlier as Dinithi mentioned. I think best friends turn in to LOVERS have a great possibility to have good mutual understanding than a relationship with a stranger. But it's more complicated and hurting when we loose a BEST FRIEND because of LOVE. That's the worst part friendship- Lovers. In this movie at some point it shows how these two face such incidents. It's better to know the limits. because Friendship is MORE COMFORTING, VALUABLE than a LOVE AFFAIR.
ReplyDeleteI cannot agree with this argument, because we cannot directly say that frienship is valuable than love or love is valuble than frienship. It depends on the nature of that relationship. There are some instances that friends are closer than lovers and at the same time there are some lovers closer than friends. Someone sees his/her partner as best friend of there life also,because they can share any secret or any feelings between them. So, the strength of a relationship is based on their mutual understanding and therefore we cannot mention that love is better than frienship or friendship is better than love.
ReplyDeleteIn my opinion, friendship is an opportunity to love. Friendship and love are quintessential factors for happy,successful life.Friendship and love are more broad, the relationships that cultivate in their lives, are some of the most valuable treasures a person can own. we can see how the internet influences, how we meet people and develop deep relationships. i cannot say that friendship is better than love. both of them are significance.
ReplyDeleteI can agree with your statement kasoo. Friendship is always better than love as pavani mentioned. When friends turn to lovers they can't be friends again at all. I know it very well. Love is the killer of friendship. When friendship turns into love you feel that closness and you don't have to change your behaviour. But if the fall apart and again become friends it won't work. You feel really bad for you. You can't think about him or her as your friend who you laughed together. You feel that strangeness. We are humans. Though the both agree to become friends it never ever work. (Here I'm talking according to my experience). Though you become friends after an affair one of you or both of you have that romantic feeling in the bottom of your heart. You don't want to show it to that person. But you show it. It's natural. In the bottom of your heart you are unable to accept him or her as your friend. There you are doing an act. It's not your actual behaviour. So in the conclusion I would like to say that friendship is better than love because once you become lovers you can't be friends again. But it is not vise versa. You can have a one sided love if you want to keep both friendship and love at the same time. But it's not easy as I mentioned 😄. You can't bottle up your feelings all the time. So it is your choice to become friends or lovers.
ReplyDeleteI cannot completely agree on this.If the friendship and love are weighed in a balance, which side will raise up? Isn't it depending on personal experience? Both friendship and love have a similar trait and that is intimacy .In my opinion what I believe is a romantic relationship will not last without intimate relationship ,so as the friendship. So, if the intimacy is important the best thing happens when your love is often your best friend for a reason.It is true that he freedom within the friendship will allow you to live in that moment but what if your friends do not want to commit for yourself. In such instances you need a love.We all know about the film "Friends with Benefits" where friends can have sexual relationships with each other but lack of commitment and intimate connection is there plus it is not strong as a love.
ReplyDeleteI cannot completely agree with your argument. To someone, friendship can be the most valuable thing in life but to another one love can be the most valuable thing. It is relative, depends on the person. Someone may not gifted with true love and at the same time someone may not gifted with true friendship.We all have friends but most of them are not real friends.You need time to understand them. In a love relationship, it is the same. You need time to understand your lover.As you said, there is nothing unspeakable inside a friendship, even between some lovers, there is nothing unspeakable.In both the cases, they may have respect for other and vice versa.The love is strong when two best friends fall in love and you feel it more.They never stop their mad activities,nonsense and allow being free as before.when a friendship turns into a love, we cannot say that they lose their friendship.They still can be the best friends. It doesn't matter love or friendship, we all are sad or have fear of losing our associates. There may be stories it is good being friends without being lovers.Thus, it is not same for all our lives.
ReplyDelete"Love is something like nirvana", at the very sight this phrase took my attention, and this leads me to think deeper about the connection of "love" and "friendship". Yes, it is true that we are very much familiar with our friends and we never hesitate to tell any secret to our best friends. we can be real us in front of them. True friendship means a great bond. But, on the other hand, it is injustice to say that "love is a limit based on rights". It depends on the kind of relationship we have. Also, there are many occasions where good friends become lovers. I personally know such instances, and what I have notice there is that, those kind of relationships are stronger, because, as once they were good friends they know each other very well. So, neither love or friendship does not decide the meaning of a relationship, but, it is based on trust.
ReplyDeleteWhat we all know is that both friendship and love are extremely significant feelings that are being maintained by humans. According to my point of view, we cannot say friendship is better than love or vice versa since it totally depends on personal experience. Friends becoming lovers is not an instant thing and most of the time best friends transform into lovers after having a good mutual understanding with each other. In a mature romantic relationship the space for freedom, nonsense and madness should be allowed without restrictions as same as in friendships only if you're in a relationship with the right person. If not, that relationship tends to break up or it may be a fake one. When we meet fake friends instead of real friends, those friends may allow you to do anything because they don't really care about you and don't have closeness with you. Conversely, a lover or a life partner has great intimacy with you and he/she is the one who really cares about you. In such situations, lovers can also become best friends in their relationship, providing freedom to each other.
ReplyDeleteAn emotion which has loads of affection for someone,that tenderness and deep passion,such a feeling is called love.lf there is mutual admiration and fixation for one another,it can be considered as friendship.ln a love relationship,we have to deal with pain.Also,we have to sacrifice our happiness for someone else.Because,that's what love is...someone else's happiness above your own.As you mentioned,friendship is a love based on freedom.Actually,it can be considered as the best kind of love.According to personal experiences,people can decide,which one is better?Is it LOVE or FRIENDSHIP ?Also,two friends can fall in love though improving their mutual understanding.But,it is difficult to two lovers to become best friends.But,both love and friendship are essential for our lives to change our chapters in life.
ReplyDeleteIf you love your friend, you will either have both love and friendship or lose both of them. Converting your friendship to love means extending the scope of friendship. In other words, love is the outer circle and friendship is the inner circle within that outer circle. Thereby, becoming lovers does not mean that you lose your friend. It means that friendship extends to an unlimited level.
ReplyDeleteMmmm... As I think there is no wrong in both relationships of love and friendship. Even in a love relationship, there could be love.In brief, what I wanted to say is do not worry or measure what is the best, either love or friendship, just feel free to engage with feeling that is attached to someone. BUT remember with your spontaneous feelings. Then there will no regret of missing them.
ReplyDeleteAccording to my point of view love is an emotion while friendship is a relationship.Unlike friendship love typically involves a deeper level of attachment.Love can be felt towards everyone without needing to establish any kind of relationship with anyone.On the other hand friendship requires a strong degree of association.Since love and friendship are closely intertwined,distinguishing the differences between the two can be challenging.
ReplyDeleteIf LOVE is a limit based on rights, then FRIENDSHIP is a love based on freedom.
ReplyDeleteI really love the way that you have ended your post. Through out the reading, the point at which both my eyes and mind get linked together is the above mentioned quote. Yes, in that sense I do agree with you, because freedom in friendship is hundred and thousand times better than the rules and conditions that come with love. Out of love and friendship, I think friendship as the relationship that let us behave as we are, while in love we always try to alter ourselves according to the needs and desires of the partner. Moreover having a real friend is a comfort zone for someone as they are mentally and physically exercising the freedom within the relationship. Friends do not judge us, you can confess your deep soul, reveal any secret to your friend, but not to your partner due to the fear of judgement. IN THAT SENSE YOU DO NOT POSSESS THE MENTAL FREEDOM WITHIN A LOVE RELATIONSHIP. With a friend you can try and explore new and crazy things of the world, but mostly in love there is an accepted way that you should behave based on the rules and restrictions of whom you are involved in love with.SO, WHERE IS YOUR PHYSICAL FREEDOM?. in contrast to my opinion, some might think love as the supreme relationship while friendship as nothing. I think assuming whether love or friendship the best is something totally personal and it depends on the personal experiences. According to my point of view, and the facts I have mentioned above , I believe that friendship is better than love in many aspects.